Sunday, December 15, 2013

reflections on 2013 and resolving 2014

so it's that time of year, that time when we reflect on the past 300+ days! join with family and friends to celebrate the season, and (best or worst of all) set goals for next year.

this past year I think has been a good one for me personally. i have become more patent in my professional life - taken on new challenges, worked to affect change and stayed happy with my job. i have been interviewing people over the past couple of months and one response i am proud to give is that yes even though my commute is longer than I had ever planned or wanted, i have never woken up on a work day and said "i can't do this anymore I hate my job, it's time to change" and i've never said at the end of the day, "this place is so crazy that it's time to look for something else...". i'm lucky that i love my job, i love the people i work with and for as many challenges (personalities, procedural, technological) that exist in my organization, i'm proud of the accomplishments i have under my belt. i don't struggle with recognition for good work, now i find myself struggling with ideas versus the number of hours in a day - this is a great place to be! so professionally, i'm in a place i want to be or at least on the right track to get there.

i contribute to my own blog, have been quoted by leading industry publications and blogs, i quest blog for formstack, and i have heard first hand from industry professionals that my reputation proceeds me. professionally, life is good.

personally, i'm equally happy. i have a supportive partner whom i adore. we live in a great area, our dogs are our kids, we are comfortable, we travel to places, and for as different as we are he helps ground me with views that aren't my own.

though I don't contact them enough i do think of my family. i see the success in my sister that has been a long time in the making - she was always destined for success, the timing is finally there, i know that she and her family will expand and take off like gang busters this year. they have too, the comments about her business, moo thru, are just to great.

my relationship with my brother is getting there. he and i will never have the relationship other brothers have, we're to different. we grew up at different times, though we had the same family, we grew up in different families. though i know from family stories that he used to change my dipers ands stuff, my first memory of him is sitting in the car when I was little going to the mailbox with my mother, her opening his graduation pictures (long before the days of digital cameras) and me asking her who that is...he was 18, I was 4. my next memory is at 5, it was after a kindergarten school day, and he toke me to kings dominion. our spat from two years ago has essentially been ignored, hateful things were said to each other and now we are able to converse. we have a relationship where we can tolerate each other, but i don't  think we'll ever have a relationship where we confide in each other. sad as it may sound, i think it's a big step to know that we are totally different and from totally different family dynamics.

mom continues to be mom and to take great strides in the treatment of her cancer. she's stronger than she knows - always has been - but you see where she's not the person who raised you. the wrinkles are deeper, the skin is thinner...the reliance on others is more pronounced. but she's strong and she'll stick around and fight for a long time i'm sure.

i'm not sure if my family understands or even realizes that I've always lived a world a part from them. the venn diagram of our family looks more like neighbors than we do integrated circles. i'm not sure that they have ever thought about it...i live in a hyper connected world in the city. they live in a rural area on dial-up and are closer in age - my sister is 8 years older than me, my brother is 14 years older than me...those two share a bond that i don't have and will never have. we grew up in different times, seeking different measures of success. my brother is gay too, and you'd think that we'd have a bond equal to big sister/little sisters, but again our lives are so different. but we're family and you don't get to choose them.

that's 2013 in is good.

so what do i want out of 2014? i'm turning 40 after all...which in all honesty i'm having huge issues my head, it is going to be the 1st anniversary of turning 39....but here goes, my list of resolutions:

1. fiscally money, spend money, reduce my total credit card debt by 75% by june
2. get my weight down to 175...(currently i'm at 215) july 22
3. integrate veggies into my diet - i have to say this is the one that sets me up for failure cause i hate them...
4. blog more - professionally
5. be the best partner I can be - pay rent on time, remind him that he's a huge part of my life, do the dishes, wash the laundry (or hire a service that will, lol) little romantic things that reinforce my commitment

now the fun stuff!!!

6. see more shows in nyc and dc...include regional productions
7. make more friends
8. get a sleeve tattoo (i have a theme and components just need to do it)
9. make a bucket list of things I want to do, want to see, want to go to
10. read more
11. integrate google glass into my life and develop apps for it
12. write a book about email design

I think 12 is enough for now. ill periodically check in on these as the year progresses, but with all of that said, happy holidays - reach out to family, be kind to strangers and tell someone you love them.

here's to looking towards 2014!!!


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